David betrayed his life partner and he was not prepared for his partner’s emotional distress. He wanted to know when it would end. He asked “Why isn’t sorry good enough?” David needed to understand that his partner’s reactions were normal. Her healing was largely dependent on his ability to be empathic, remorseful, honest, apologetic, loving, patient and soothing over a long period of time. And most importantly to stop the behavior that devastated his spouse. Normal reactions of the betrayed…
Established in 1982
Author: Maureen Chapman
Maureen offers an environment in which rapport safety, empathy and trust are instilled to assist her clients in addressing their personal life challenges.
Her areas of interest include depression, anxiety, and communication breakdown, assertiveness skills, self-esteem, personal growth, family of origin issues, health anxiety and the development of emotional awareness. She has a special interest in assisting individuals and families impacted by emotional dysregulation, high sensitivity, introversion, narcissism and borderline personality traits.
Maureen’s therapeutic approach is eclectic and dependent on the client’s situation and goals. Techniques may include Cognitive Behavioural, modified Dialectical Behavioural, Emotionally Focused, Systems and Adlerian therapy.
Prior to obtaining her Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology from Adler School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, Maureen was a research assistant with the U.B.C. Mood Disorders Clinic and a volunteer with the RCMP Victim Services.
Maureen is married with 3 adult children.
Maureen is also a member of the British Columbia Association of Clinical Counsellors and the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association
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Why do we Lie?
Lying destroys relationships and damages the bonds between human beings. The Journal of Intercultural Communication Research (2016) states that “we all lie, but not all lies are the same. People lie to achieve a goal: WE LIE IF [we believe] HONESTY WON’T WORK. Essentially the truth comes naturally, but lying takes effort and a sharp, flexible mind. Lying is a part of the development process, like walking and talking. Children learn to lie between the ages two and five, and…
Posted in Depression, General, Marriage & Relationships, Stress & Anxiety, Therapy Tagged with: addiction, depression, Dissapointment, fear, Lying, marriage, money, relationships, therapy, trust
Empathy and Mirror Neurons
Empathy differs from sympathy. Sympathy reflects an understanding of another person’ situation- but viewed through your own eyes. In contrast, empathy is what you feel when you can step outside of yourself and enter the internal world of another person. You experience the other’s emotions and conflict without abandoning or losing your own perspective. It involves being able “to see with the eyes of another, to hear with the ears of another, to feel with the heart of another” (Alfred…
Posted in Depression, Family & Parenting, General, Marriage & Relationships, Personal Growth, Stress & Anxiety, Therapy Tagged with: anger, depre, extroversion, gaming, introversion, realtionships, stress
The Gifts of Introversion (or being quiet)
Very few people are completely extroverted or introverted, but for those who are closer to the introverted end of the spectrum, please read on. Extroversion has been seen as the ideal personality type. What we are now recognizing is that introversion is also a normal variation of personality. Research shows that the brains of introverts are more active than those of extroverts. This explains why introverts limit how much comes in, while extroverts go where the action is. In brief, these mostly…
Posted in General
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
Sam came in highly nervous to attend his first therapy session. He was distressed and stated his doctor wanted him to have Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for his depression, anger, and anxiety. Sam feverently added, “I don’t have a million dollars to spend on therapy and don’t want to be in here for the rest of my life.” Sam was informed that CBT is a form of psychotherapy that emphasizes the important role of thinking about how we feel and…
Health Anxiety
People with health anxiety focus on specific sensations such as feeling dizzy, fatigue, joint pain, digestive problems, a headache or a quick and sudden heartbeat. Such physiological symptoms are typically not harmful if they are short lived and do not re-occur on a repeated basis. The difficulty that people with health anxiety have is that they misattribute these symptoms as indicating there MUST be significant disease lurking. Like many people, they will make an appointment with their doctor to have these symptoms…
Posted in Depression, General, Personal Growth, Stress & Anxiety Tagged with: anxiety, CBT, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, health, physical manifestations, worry
Bipolar Disorder
Since Alexis was about 16 she had bouts with depression, irritability, doing poorly in school, crying and isolating herself. After awhile she seemed to get better, and started to engage with people, becoming the life of the party, talking a mile a minute. She would re-focus on her school work, stay up all night, and then CRASHHH. Down she would come again. These cycles would repeat themselves over the next 20 years. Alexis and her family were obviously deeply concerned…
Emotional Intimacy
The idea of love has captured the imagination of humanity and has intrigued the hearts and minds of men and women since the beginning of time. Years ago I came across a couple who were moving towards divorce following 32 years of marriage. Both in their 50’s, the wife appeared sad and tired of living in what she believed was a loveless marriage. David was shocked that Diana could make the claim he had never loved her. His life dream…
Posted in Marriage & Relationships
Destructive Narcissistic Parents – Part II
In the Summer of 2010 a published PsycHealth article on “Destructive Narcissistic Parents” triggered a number of calls from the adult offspring of these parents. They felt relieved in recognizing that they were not alone, nor were their parents who struggled with these traits. In therapy they were able to address the emotions they encountered during parental interactions. They learned to develop assertiveness, independence and healthy boundaries. Yet, something was missing. They described sadness, bitterness, and resentment at the wasted…
Destructive Narcissistic Parents
Susan was asked to go to her parents’ home for dinner. After trying on four outfits, she fell into a heap on the bed crying. Mark, her husband, had seen this behavior before. Wrapping his arms around her he gently said “I know your parents are going to make a comment about your appearance or weight, no matter what you wear. We don’t have to go Susan, why do you keep torturing yourself?” Why indeed? As a grown woman she…
Posted in Family & Parenting
