This is not how I had planned my life to be…. I’ve lost interest in this job that I used to love…. I’ve never enjoyed working and I don’t know that I ever will…… Is this all there is?……. Vision. Passion. Dreams. Hope….how do you bring these into a life course that seems to have gone off track or has somehow become stalled.
What is a metaphor for your life? An uphill climb? A competitive race? A field of wildflowers? Most people find that as life unfolds, it seems to take unexpected twists and turns. These are usually a mix of wanted and unwanted life events.
Whether you are 13, 37, 55, or 109…or anywhere in between, most people feel stalled or off course at points in their lives. You have choices. You can ignore feeling off course. That might work for awhile. You can allow yourself to be discouraged. You can also take a closer look at what the roadblock is…what is keeping you stuck and what has taken you off course?
Re-assessing where you have been, where you are going, and where you would like to be in the future, these are keys to unlocking the stuckness.
Here are some guidelines to help envision new goals and dreams :
- Being stuck or feeling off track can happen at any age. New studies on “brain plasticity” means that we can keep learning, growing, and making changes in our lives into old age. It’s never too late to formulate a new vision, new goals, plans and dreams.
- Make space in your life to take a closer look at your past, present and future. Think about what the messages were in your family and cultural background. Write them down and then decide which of those you want to hang onto and which ones to discard. Congratulate yourself for accomplishments and achievements. Allow yourself to daydream. Bring in your creative side by considering metaphors for your current situation and your vision for your future. What is the metaphor…spinning hay into gold? Metaphors can help to spark our vision for the future and provide us a picture to hold onto and a target to aim for. Allow yourself to wonder about what it is that you wanted for your life when you were a child…is some of that still true? Personality and individual preferences show up early in life. Sometimes we end up silencing our childlike parts because other messages about what we should be crowd out the early wisdom.
- Ask yourself if you are using the talents, skills, and abilities that you enjoy using. Maybe there are new skills that you would like to develop.
- Be on the alert for new opportunities. We easily miss opportunities because we aren’t watching for them.
- Be willing to take some risks. Change can be risky.
- Hold on to your vision. Persist. Be careful who you share it with. Allow yourself to share it with others who you know will cheer you on.
- If you believe in prayer, pray about it.